Assignment #18: My Poem

Beautiful first baby, was a cry baby at times but because she was spoiled

not spoiled by the dad she never knew but by her grandma she lost at the age of 4

childhood is just sort of a blur to her but she does remember the nights she cried herself to

sleep, missing her mother while her mother was serving this country.

day by day she became more and more confused, the man taking her birth dad's place in her life

was always so nice to her,but she always had in her mind"why is this man trying to win my love over

with all these things but then this man known as dad and husband making the ones i love feel unhappy

and unloved." Always trying to find the way out of her depression but wasn't able to do many things

 with her friends, she found a window which she thought it would lead her to forget her problems but it

 actually just lead her to having a "position of narcotics" in her record at the age of 12. going through the

years she always put her sadness and depression to the back of her mind and at the very bottom of her

heart as if it was never there. little by little it started overflowing, she was finding herself more and more

 lost and abanded ever time she took a step foward. she eventually found herself lost and as if she was

drowning, she did not know what way to turn. The memory of the pretty baby drinking from a bottle

was tainted from the picture of a pretty sweet young lady drinking from a tequila bottle that would

appear in the mothers mind as she could smell alcohol coming from her daughter.the girl trying to take

her life away never realized she wasn't harming herself but her mother and her younger brother and

young sister that really looked up to her.Trying to change her life around she is still having trouble to

 get things the way they should be but still hurts from the fact that people judge her from things that

happened in the past. she is still lost in this world but very determined to get her life

straight and finally be happy even if she is alone with nobody by her side. she is thankful for what others

have done for her specially her mother, but she does understand that the pain she caused her

mother will never be forgiven even if she is ashamed of it.

It hurts but she will never show, its pain no one will ever know nor understand.